Kidizms - 07/21/14

     If I'm ever at a loss on what to blog about, I know I can always fall back on the crazy things kids say.  No matter how many times I've shared their comments here or on Facebook, their little mouths and minds continue to supply an endless stream of new and improved material.
    Like last year when my daughter's teacher was going over the three branches of government: executive, legislative and judicial.  As she went into deeper detail about the judicial branch, my daughter promptly raised her hand and volunteered this profound statement: "My aunt is a court."  Her aunt (my sister,) is actually an attorney.  Close enough.

     At the beginning of school last year, my son's teacher asked the students to draw a picture of something they did during the summer and write a sentence about it.  My son drew a picture of himself and a big fish.  He wrote, "I cot a 10 pond CRAP."  Translation~ "I caught a 10 pound CARP,"  which by the way is a fish tale as it was only about 2 pounds.  Thankfully, he didn't get in trouble for writing a cuss word on his paper. 

    My sweet little niece Marin, who just turned 6, says she loves to LERAX.   Translation~ Relax   Me too!!!!!!

     My nephew, Bobby, who is 5 visited us at the lake a couple of weeks ago.  We drove him by the dam the Tennessee Valley Authority uses for flood control and power generation.  We said,  "Look Bobby, there's a dam."  His reply?  "Did beavers build that?"   Then as I got ready to take him on his first jet ski ride he asks, "Does this thing have a seat belt?" 

    Finally, I have lots of proud mommy moments, but this is not one of them.  When my son was much younger, he spotted a woman who had apparently forgotten to wear her upstairs undergarment.  He taps me on the shoulder and says, "Mom, look... that lady has dot boobs."  What can I say.. he's all boy. 


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Last Update on October 07, 2015 09:35 GMT


LANSING, Mich. (AP) -- Take this job and -- well, you know the rest. A Michigan Powerball winner quit her job on the spot after learning she had won a more than $310 million jackpot. Julie Leach says her job as a supervisor at a fiberglass factory was nasty and dirty. Leach says she was having a "really bad night" working the third shift, when she took her lunch break at McDonald's. She checked the five numbers in the drive-thru line. She's opted for a lump-sum payout of about 140 mil after taxes. Leach says she hopes to build her own little community of houses for her children and grandkids.


LOS ANGELES (AP) -- High school senior John Krahn is big -- even for a football player. At 7 feet and 440 pounds, the Riverside, California, teenager could be the biggest guy ever to play high school football. Even NFL players would have to look up to him. But big John would like to be a little less big. He was wants to lose some weight to increase his speed and mobility. His coach at Martin Luther King High is Kevin Corridan. Corridan recognizes John needs some work to be able to play big-time college ball. But Corridan says his giant offensive lineman is "a kid worth taking a chance on."


TUCSON, Ariz. (AP) -- Call it a marijuana mystery. Border Patrol agents have seized nearly 1,400 pounds of weed found near the fence that runs along the U.S.-Mexico border in Arizona. Federal officials say the bundles of pot were somehow launched over the fence. In the past, drug smugglers have used catapults and even air-cannons to send contraband sailing over the border. In the latest incident, agents recovered about 80 large bundles of the illegal weed.


PORTLAND, Ore. (AP) -- Police could be looking for a healthy bandit. A truckload of tofu and organic drinks has been stolen. Police in Portland, Oregon, have recovered the missing delivery truck, but the cargo was gone. According to authorities, the truck was swiped from a parking lot, while the driver was inside a grocery store. Police say a tip led them to the truck in another part of town, but not the tofu or drinks.

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