Bullying .. Then & Now - 11/18/13
Hey Friends ...
I'm gonna go on a "rant" for this blog. Here we go.
Overall, I have a bad memory. I'm one of those people that literally can hear a story from my past and say "I remember NONE of that". Then there are other things and I remember every single tiny detail of. Odd how our minds work. That said .. there is a lot about my past that I do remember...but sure wish I didn't.
I am not sure when I was bullied for the first time. However... I know I was really little...1st grade I think. While it had it's moments...overall elementary school wasn't too bad. I was too busy "falling in and out of love" and dealing with my first broken heart :) Middle School certainly had really rough moments though. Especially from the girls one year older than me. But high school - yea - those were the really bad times. I was bullied from every walk of life. From my "friends" .. from the girls at the other middle school that we had to "merge" with ... to enemies I didn't even know I had ... that literally told me they only hated me because "My family wasn't poor like them". I literally couldn't win. Even my "church friends" bullied me at times! I had a few "rocks" - but overall I hated my teenage years. I did a really good job of hiding it. I'm not sure my parents even knew. A big reason - we grew up in a time of no cell phones and no computers. So it stayed at school. On occasion - I got it walking home from the bus stop. But that was the extent of it. Thank GOD we didn't have social media back then. I could not imagine.
Ironically, some of the girls I remember picking on me the most are actually my "friends" on Facebook now. I see the pictures they post with their little kids and I often wonder - will they teach their daughter/son to NOT be what they were to me?
I saw this article in the Huffington Post and it was beautifully written. I don't have children - but if I did - I would be glad I read this.
I guess the one positive thing is that it does get better - eventually. Wait ... actually...I'm not gonna lie ... bullying never really goes away. It just changes. I was bullied in college. Heck, I had 3 adult guy friends be bullied by another guy just this Sunday because they are gay! Maybe these were the bullies we dealt with in school that just never "grew out of it" or maybe they were the ones bullied that never "got over it". With age...bullies don't go away ... we just don't call them "bullies" anymore. Why? Well ... I guess what happens is that we just grow up and learn that they just don't matter. Their opinions of us don't matter. Their words .. don't matter. So much else .. matters. But they ... don't.
It wasn't until the last ten years that I learned how to not allow myself to be bullied. I started taking up for myself. I think I over compensate for it at times now. I've had to learn how to not be TOO quick with people that are being ugly to me or the people I love. But honestly - I don't know about you - but I'd rather be a little spitfire than anyones doormat.
In closing - I'll be wearing purple on 10/17 for #SpiritDay. A day that everyone comes together and says I DO NOT ACCEPT BULLYING OF ANY KIND!!! I hope you join me!